|
The GRIEVING PROCESS
After the initial process of having to put
a beloved pet or any other
animal to rest we immediately go through
cycles of recovery.
Cycles from the emotional trauma that, believe it or not,
do help us to get through it. It's normal.
I'm providing this list to what some of those feelings
are as I am
actually going through them myself today.
Again, it is normal. I know this because it
happens every time.
I don't think there is any particular order as everyone
may be different
but here are mine, from the feelings of my hearts present
loss.
CONFUSION
(the decision that, most of the time, had no right or
wrong answer)
FRUSTRATION
(there was no where to turn for the actual "right thing
to do")
SADNESS
(it's over, the end, no turning back)
*** GUILT/ FEELINGS OF SELFISHNESS ***
(you feel like you let them down, let down your Higher
Power,
wondering if what you did was selfish or "the best thing
for the animal",
wondering if they're up there or somewhere asking why you
did it &
was it because you didn't care for or love them and there is
so much more)
This topic's a toughy...
You HAVE to remind yourself of all ways you did care for
them,
the ways you did show how much you loved them, how much
you
cared, anything & everything you can think of.
Just think, this final act in itself may be the one way you
showed you
do care. To rid them of further pain & suffering.
This is the granddaddy of all unselfish acts.
*** you have to tell yourself all of it or this one
will drive you insane ***
DOUBT
(perhaps you're asking yourself if there "was something"
you could
have done, maybe you missed something, maybe you could
have
taken on the large responsibility that brought you to
your decision,
you go through all the options over & over again)
WONDER
(was their life a good one, were they happy, did I do
enough for them,
could I have done it better, could I have treated them
better, spent
more time with them, given them more, did I love them
enough &
did they know I did, should I have done this or that to
ensure
they did know... and so many other things)
ANGER
(feeling like your Higher Power let YOU down, let the
animal down,
"how could He allow something so cruel happen to such a
wonderful,
loving, innocent creature?, angry at yourself due to the
reasons of guilt)
HELPLESSNESS
(they're gone now & your skin seems to crawl from the
final emotion...below)
LOSS/ EMPTINESS
(they are no longer in the locations in which you were
use to seeing them,
no longer come running the way you can only
remember,
no longer there for you to say their name and get a
response,
no longer available to hug, hold & love, they are
simply... gone.
SELF PITY/ DEPRESSION
(This one is difficult to describe but I do know
something else,
it's OK. It too, is normal but you have to do another thing,
admit it.
Talk to someone. Get it out. Some people actually have to
see
counselors, psychologists & psychiatrists.
If talking to a friend or loved one, tell them in advance
that you're
just calling to cry and you need someone to listen no
matter how
bazaar, unreasonable, ridiculous or out of control you
may sound.
Explain to them that you need to vent and that you may
say things
just to get through all these emotions. Admit that you're
"a wreck".
If they're good friends that also love animals, they will
understand)
DON'T FORGET TO CRY, LET IT OUT.
I BELIEVE IT CLEANSES ALL THAT BAD STUFF OUT.
(then you get to ACCEPTANCE)
WE ALL GO THOUGH IT. EVEN I'M ADMITTING IT.
(write to ME if you like, I understand)
|